I ran across a great quote from Cate Blanchett recently and it struck a chord with me. The great Ms. Blanchett was quoted as saying, "I'm not focused on what other people think of me. Some people get you and some people don't, and to spend your life trying to make people understand how deep and complex and varied you are -- I think that way lies madness." I find this to be so very true.
We all do it to some degree. We all want to show people that we are good at what we do, that we are multi-talented, deep-thinking individuals—that’s human nature. And we’ve all crossed the lines a time or two by trying too hard. Every time I try too hard to show someone who I am, I always, always end up with egg on my face.
If I try to hard to show people that I am a stylish and cool person, I end up looking like an Olsen twin. If I try too hard to be smart and deep, I inevitably say something completely inane and inaccurate and it becomes painfully obvious that a) I am not smart and not astute enough to know when to keep my yapper shut, and b) I am so desperate to be liked that I am willing to lie to you.
It’s the folks that will sacrifice their dignity to prove to you that they are deep and complex that have a problem. These types of people never give you the chance to find out who they are—because they are too busy throwing their identity in your face. What they don’t understand is that the people that will get you will get you and the people that don’t—won’t, so don’t waste your time.
I think that if you use all of your energy trying to communicate who you are to people that don’t get you, you have precious little energy to invest in the people that do get you. And that, my friends, is a shame. Every time I’ve tried to be ‘gotten’ by a person that doesn’t get me, it’s been a real waste of my energy. (a big shout out to many of my ex-boyfriends--you know who you are.)
We all do it to some degree. We all want to show people that we are good at what we do, that we are multi-talented, deep-thinking individuals—that’s human nature. And we’ve all crossed the lines a time or two by trying too hard. Every time I try too hard to show someone who I am, I always, always end up with egg on my face.
If I try to hard to show people that I am a stylish and cool person, I end up looking like an Olsen twin. If I try too hard to be smart and deep, I inevitably say something completely inane and inaccurate and it becomes painfully obvious that a) I am not smart and not astute enough to know when to keep my yapper shut, and b) I am so desperate to be liked that I am willing to lie to you.
It’s the folks that will sacrifice their dignity to prove to you that they are deep and complex that have a problem. These types of people never give you the chance to find out who they are—because they are too busy throwing their identity in your face. What they don’t understand is that the people that will get you will get you and the people that don’t—won’t, so don’t waste your time.
I think that if you use all of your energy trying to communicate who you are to people that don’t get you, you have precious little energy to invest in the people that do get you. And that, my friends, is a shame. Every time I’ve tried to be ‘gotten’ by a person that doesn’t get me, it’s been a real waste of my energy. (a big shout out to many of my ex-boyfriends--you know who you are.)
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